i’m 16 and need your opinion please..?
i’m writing a series called ravens’head.It’s about 12 yrs old victor greene,a carefree young chap who spends half of his day working as a butcher boy to pay for the rent of the house,since his father is mysteriously away all the time.But one day he finds his mother poisoned (a suicidal note was beside her).And when he mentioned his father the authorities told him that elliot greene had officialy died in a car acciedent 2 years ago.Now,after being thrown on the streets of london,unable to pay the rent of the hovel.victor is summoned by a mysterious man driving a carriage to ravens’head orphanage….in a secret street in cornwell the huge orphange stands,inside the ophanage vicotr finds out that everything is done through magical equations that are written on magnifying lenses.Victor learns magic math along with the other orphans,and at night he sleeps on the classical music played by an orchestra of centaurs and bugled out through huge speaker all over the place.But one day victor finds out from noah(a werebear working in the orphanage’s cafe)the deadly secrets that brought victor into the orphanage ,also he tells him of godnofer the owner of the orphanage who’s entranced by a magical equation in one of the secret rooms in the orphanage for 30 years.But noah tells victor of godnofer’s biggest plan,that will make of all ravens’head orphans his followers.But first of all he has to wake up from his trance and the only one that would be able to do so is victor himself,he’ll have to wake up his enemy….but victor won’t go alone ,sylvia victor’s new love interest an friend follows him everywhere to make sure that he’s ok….along the 4 books series victor uncovers secrets of his father,mother,and origin…And above all he finds that his father is alive and he’s on the dark side along with godnofer…..the secret of his mother’s poisoning ,and the deadly magical equations all will be unraveled …..
the second idea is also about victor greene a boy who finds out that he can do magic with equations,but one day a man summons him and gives him the post of a secret private detective across many magical worlds,and victor has to unsolve great mysteries,and cases along the way.
which’s better??
(i’m 16,and i write better than these synopsis…do u like the idea …is it original?would it make a nice series??)(actualy i love it)
Do you like my novel excerpt? THANKS!!!?
[from chapter 1] Btw-shoot is actually a swear but yahoo answers made me change it.
“Shoot.” Chloe murmured, staring at the frenzied café engulfing her. Lunch is a sociological study of high school. Where you sit + who you sit with = who you are. Chloe had once thought there was nothing more frightening then an R-rated, blood curdling horror film. Now as a vulnerable freshman at RockMaster High School, she realized there was nothing more horrifying than the cafeteria. Chloe didn’t belong here, she was destined for greater and better things. Los Angeles. It’s a city of salesmen, a place of relentless schmoozing and professional networking that are not only considered beneficial, but, in fact, vital for survival. The schmooze is part flattery, part small talk, and 100 percent charm. If you’re a wallflower, shake off that caterpillar shell and make a 180-degree turn into social butterfly. Only people who are incredibly famous can afford to become hermits, like Britney Spears, who is so famous for being a recluse that she has made her sons, her sister, and her estranged former 18-year old one-night fling famous too. Unless you’re planning to become a notoriously moody literary phenomenon, a critically praised luminary who writes novels that are studied in high school English classes, you’re going to require some help. In this world of ego and ambition, staking your claim on fame is about having a larger-than-life personality- one that sucks the oxygen out of any room and guarantees all eyes will be on you. Chloe practiced her exuberant “Hello, so lovely to meet yous” in front of a mirror repeatedly before taking it public. No one ever became famous sitting at home watching the latest chick show on the WB (and repeats of it at 11 P.M) in cotton pajamas with a mountain of dirty dishes in the sink. Chloe’s stomach twisted she fished through her quilted tote for her phone. Leaving the cafeteria, she hit Giselle’s cell phone number on her autodial. RockMaster High School was Giselle’s acclaimed kingdom, she could easily snag Chloe a table or even company.
um no thats not my plot at all.
She becomes famous-
gets into drugs/drinkings/smoking
Loses her fame
Her sister becomes famous and need her money for an abortion, but Chloe dosent want to give it to her.
Not to mention, the person that got giselle pregnant is trying to date chloe.
and there is way more stuff going on but ill leave it at that
thankyou for the compliment 
which idea graps attention more?
i’m writing a series called ravens’head.It’s about 12 yrs old victor greene,a carefree young chap who spends half of his day working as a butcher boy to pay for the rent of the house,since his father is mysteriously away all the time.But one day he finds his mother poisoned (a suicidal note was beside her).And when he mentioned his father the authorities told him that elliot greene had officialy died in a car acciedent 2 years ago.Now,after being thrown on the streets of london,unable to pay the rent of the hovel.victor is summoned by a mysterious man driving a carriage to ravens’head orphanage….in a secret street in cornwell the huge orphange stands,inside the ophanage vicotr finds out that everything is done through magical equations that are written on magnifying lenses.Victor learns magic math along with the other orphans,and at night he sleeps on the classical music played by an orchestra of centaurs and bugled out through huge speaker all over the place.But one day victor finds out from noah(a werebear working in the orphanage’s cafe)the deadly secrets that brought victor into the orphanage ,also he tells him of godnofer the owner of the orphanage who’s entranced by a magical equation in one of the secret rooms in the orphanage for 30 years.But noah tells victor of godnofer’s biggest plan,that will make of all ravens’head orphans his followers.But first of all he has to wake up from his trance and the only one that would be able to do so is victor himself,he’ll have to wake up his enemy….but victor won’t go alone ,sylvia victor’s new love interest an friend follows him everywhere to make sure that he’s ok….along the 4 books series victor uncovers secrets of his father,mother,and origin…And above all he finds that his father is alive and he’s on the dark side along with godnofer…..the secret of his mother’s poisoning ,and the deadly magical equations all will be unraveled …..
the second idea is also about victor greene a boy who finds out that he can do magic with equations,but one day a man summons him and gives him the post of a secret private detective across many magical worlds,and victor has to unsolve great mysteries,and cases along the way.
which’s better??
(i’m 16,and i write better than these synopsis…do u like the idea …is it original?would it make a nice series??)(actualy i love it)
What you gonna when you are sick and tired of living with an alcoholic parent?
My dad is an alcoholic way back when he was a teenager. My mom left us when I was 6 bec. she couldn’t handle their sick marriage life anymore. She is now in Germany with her new family. My dad usually gets drunk at night and becomes wild, angry & would really turn the stereo’s volume to the max that our neighbors in our apartment get disturbed. I can’t do anything but hide in my room bearing the tremendous hurt & shame & cry when it seems too much already and just wait for the nightmare to end and that everything will be well and peaceful again. Sometimes he promises not to drink anymore and he tends to quit for a few weeks or months, but then he would later go back again to his habit. I have been living with him for 21 years together with my grandmother & caregivers/househelps. After graduating College, I accepted the graveyard shift cashiering job offered by my aunt who owns an Internet Café. I chose the job even if I am underemployed in it just so I could escape the troubled life I experience everytime my dad comes home drunk at night. It’s almost a year now in my present job that I tried to live a peaceful and normal life since I can avoid sleeping at home and endure the painful situation cause by my father’s drunkenness. I just go home during the day to sleep and go back again to work at night. But the pain is not yet over when I thought I have escaped it already bec. these past few days I come home and find him having a drinking spree with his drunkard friends early in the morning or afternoon with the stereo blasting out so loud. I really don’t know what to do but to walk away so hurt and ashame. And I feel so afraid for fear that he would humiliate me & create havoc in my workplace. It’s really a miracle that I survived and finished College despite my miserable situation which gotten worse during my first years in College since my grandmother had a stroke and would cry also during the evenings or late at midnight bec. of her arthritis. I really don’t know what to do anymore. I wanted to run away and live a new life own my own but I feel that if I leave and turn my back on my dad, it gives me a deep sense of guilt for not being there to help him esp. that he is jobless and sooner or later my aunt would quit supporting him financially. He never wanted to work to earn a living bec. he was totally dependent on my aunt and grandfather. In our country, children still have a great responsibility over their parents even if they are beyond legal age due to close family ties culture. When my dad is sober he is a great person but a totally different & mean person when drunk. The next day when he wakes up everything goes back to normal. Sometimes I think that he is not really my father and that I am not his daughter bec. he never worked even once to feed his family or send me to school. It was my grandfather and aunts who supported me financially and meet my school needs. My dad neither care or even interested with my studies or helping me plan for my future. He says he is proud of me but he didn’t do anything to prove that he is. I am so sick and tired of this kind of life that I feel I am cursed or something. I tried my best to live a good life and strove hard to be a good Christian. But life is like forcing me to be insane,mean and angry with the world. Life seems so unfair to me bec. I was deprived of parents who should be nurturing and supportive but it’s painful to think I was left to stand on my own. For me, even if I finished College, I still feel like my future is so dark and that I am going to live in misery for the rest of my life. I still keep praying and hoping one day he would change. I still don’t know if there are Al-Anon meetings in our area. But I feel that Al-Anon groups wouldn’t solve the problem.I am 21 now but I don’t know if life would be better when I find a new job and rent a space to run to in case he is drunk again when I come home from work. But I feel life would still be the same bec. I think he still wouldn’t change. How can I really avoid living the pain of coming home and frequent worrying whether he is drunk or sober when I cannot dare not to return home as much as possible bec. I don’t want to neglect my father and grandmother? But living in such a depressing experience is affecting me that lowers my self-esteem so much.I didn’t went into any relationship bec. I am ashamed of my life. I seem to be always living in anger and fear everyday of my life. How am I supposed to live a good life and finally find happiness having an alcoholic dad?
